Classification of Creationists

Creationists are a particularly interesting group of apologists.  These are the people who try to maintain their delusion by applying Iron and Bronze Age mythology to modern understandings of our Universe.   These attempts to merge the ideas of a culture who were trying to figure out where the rain came from, with a culture who has put men on the Moon, are sometimes amusing, sometimes sad, and always feeble. 

As annoying as these people are, it is important to remember that the people spreading this confusing jumble of detritus are not all created equal, and, as such, should not all be treated in the same way. Once one understands which type of Creationist he or she is dealing with, he or she can then decide how best to treat that person.

To that end I offer the following classification system for creationists along with my personal take on how to deal with them.

Basic Classification:

Class I - The Ignorant
Class II - The Wilfully Ignorant
Class III - Those Who Create and Prey on the Others


Class I Creationists:

These are the truly ignorant creationists.  They honestly have not been exposed to actual science or the mountains of evidence and logic which shows their particular view of where the Universe came from to be purely fictional.  This class includes homeschooled children and the like. 

Pity and education are usually the best things one can direct at these individuals.

Class II Creationists:

These are the creationists who have been exposed to the evidence showing their mythology to be wrong, but have suppressed this knowledge in order to maintain what they now know, or at least suspect, is a delusion.  This is, by far, the largest class of Creationists and includes the parents of homeschooled children, the people who don't really care one way or the other, Fox News hosts, most politicians, and roughly 99% of the people one encounters in online discussions about the issue.

There is no standard way to treat such people, as they are an extremely varied group.  In general, some education would be a good place to start, as long as you don't expect them to accept it.  Pity is good, but should never be shown, as all this does is remind them that they are suppressing knowledge and their cognitive dissonance reactions will kick in.

Class III  Creationists:

These are the scum de la scum of the Creationist community.  Some are undoubtedly also Class II, but many appear to be pure con artist.  These people are the ones inventing and disseminating the arguments to support the mythology and in return are raking in huge profits through the sale of books, DVD's, and other assorted items like t-shirts with stupid catch phrases, to the Class IIs, and "instructional" material for the creation of more Class Is.  These are you Hovinds, Hams, Comforts, and Camerons. 

These people should be treated with as much disdain and vitriol as it is possible to disseminate.  They deserve every form of disgust that can be thrown their way, and then some.  There is no form of religious apologist, predatory pedophile, or  disease carrying vermin lower than these dregs, and they should be treated as such.


While there could easily be sub classifications for Class II Creationists, the above basic classification system should work for the most part when one is trying to figure out what type of person he or she is dealing with, and how that person should be dealt with.